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Dear White Women

December 17, 2017

I know I am going to lose friends and followers and trust, I am okay with this.

I don’t need your consent.

Now before I started this article, I literally had to seek permission from a woman I have never met, nor spoken to but whom I respect for her drive, her intelligence and her outspokenness. I chose her because I knew she would have no trouble telling me if I was being an ass. She is black, from Barbados. An island that was integral to the slave trade and taken over by Britain when they were taking over everything and being assholes. They still are. Segregation is alive and well.

I see it and it breaks my heart but I literally have no way of knowing what it actually feels like.

And that’s the problem.

So I asked.

And I listened.

And no matter what her answers, I believe her.

People assume or follow old stereotypes because it’s easier than asking. All that does is breed ignorance.

I don’t want to be ignorant.

“It was hard for me to approach you and ask if I was offside or offensive.
But I think that’s the key.
Being willing to
a) ask
and more importantly
b) accept the answer given.”

Knowing that I might be wrong, and being okay with it. Changing if necessary.

With that in mind and her permission…

Dear White Women,

What in the actual fuck are you doing right now?

You are taking up space, voting for monsters and being racist cunts.

I think I lost my ‘white girl card’ when I admitted out loud that I do not like pumpkin spice lattes, I don’t like bubble baths, any color of wine, nor shopping and I do so very much love sex.

I may have gotten honorary status back when I successfully looked cute in a pair of Uggs (one time) and went to many, many, many brunches.

But I don’t want it.

This is not a collective nor a sham of a ‘culture’ that I wish to participate in or belong to.

I can be proud of myself as an individual and not proud of the group I was born into by having tits and light skin.
I am also a stripper with a MENSA IQ, so ya. Big fan of smashing stereotypes (and the patriarchy).

I am talking to the Mean Girls, the Paris Hilton ilk and clones, the privileged, the crazy Christians, especially the evangelical Stepford wives, and the equally offensive ones who wear native headdresses to Coachella not bothering to notice that that is NOT okay and love to say Namaste after yoga talk about vibes and have no idea what that actually means.

You are not a queen or a goddess, you’re an asshole.

You are not woke, you are in a bubble.

I got in an argument on the internet the other day. I do try to abstain from such things, but this ignorant piece of shit was relentless with his ‘white pride’ bullshit. I have many things to be proud of but the geographical location and skin color I was given at birth are not among them.
I was raised to be proud of accomplishments, knowledge, things you can control…WHO you are not what you are.

Old white men have been in charge for far too long and just look.

GESTURES BROADLY AT EVERYTHING.

Now, said argument was centered around this article, which showed statistics. A cold, hard and rather ugly FACT. This is for the 63% who decided a pedophile was better than a Democrat.
Fuck you sis, and the horse he rode in on.
This is for the enablers, Brock Turner’s mom and the girl who said “he’s not a bad guy”. Yes he fucking is. Every trigger happy cop with a gun and a god complex has a mother or a wife or a sister. You failed them. You are failing everyone. You are excess baggage and dead weight holding back the evolution of society for a fucking handbag made in Vietnam and a chance to be the top mom on the phone tree.

https://www.awesomelyluvvie.com/2017/12/white-women-shit-together-alabama.html

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I read the article. And a few more things, also I have eyes and I can see what is happening here.

The solution?
And I mean this adamantly
“it is time to let black women run the world.”

… I was listening to a black woman on the radio this morning, she explained it better than I could. She said we, white people don’t listen when black people say we don’t have the right to say and do certain things to and about them. Terminology we use for each other, is not ok to use for black people because it what we used when they were slaves. When someone says no, I have to listen.
She talked about Roy Moore riding that horse to vote too. She said how everything racist white people do in the south is calculated to intimate black people and remind them of slavery. The overseer on the horse.
And how she knew, just bringing it up, there would be people rolling their eyes saying she was exaggerating. But that this is their experience, every day.

I was speaking to another (white) woman about all this.
She heard someone else’s point of view and BELIEVED her.

 […] talking about Roy Moore’s wife. How she gathered together a large group of these so called Christian white women to defend her husband and hold a public fund raiser for him with the press there. I was so angry. I couldn’t understand why anyone, let alone a woman, a mother would vote for him. A pedophile, someone who hurts children. […] these women aren’t voting for a pedophile, they’re voting against black people, in particular against black women. […] this goes back to plantation days. Doug Jones fought against the KKK, he jailed men who hurt four little girls, little black girls. These white women are sending a message. Racist white women in the south still see black women as a threat. Back in plantation days they could beat them, whip them, and have them sold if their husbands or sons took an “interest” in them, now they have to pretend to be civil. But this is how they do it. They continue to put their racist husbands, sons, brothers in power.

I believe she is right. Both racial and sexual equality is a threat to a ‘way of life’ that should have died out years ago, but they cling to their old ideals. It defies logic.

The #metoo movement was started by a woman of color but a bunch of famous white women had to say something years later then it caught like wildfire. Glad it happened, but credit where credit is due.

And yet, there are roving groups of white women trying to shut that down too. It’s almost as if they like being oppressed and owned by men even though they have NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT THAT ACTUALLY MEANS.
It’s Stockholm Syndrome on a massive scale.
They actually believe they are safe in the white castle, no honey, you aren’t.
Those are not princes, or kings or even knights. They are fools in tinfoil with olde timey blood money. Slavery never ended, it just became the prison system.

I refuse to ever say all lives matter because that is a fucking given and no one is threatening my life because of my color. A cop pulls me over and I don’t even get a ticket, that is not the grace of god that is unfair and I see it.

There’s the difference. Just because something doesn’t happen to me does not give me the right to ignore it or deny it.

That is your privilege showing yet again, please tuck that back in and shut up.

We have had the floor and the voice long enough. It is time to let others speak and for fuck sakes listen.

And I expect to hear a rousing chorus of “not all white people” and just like the “not all men” I am not listening. I know this already. I am done.

I also know there is a certain breed of men who only listen when other men talk, so as a woman, a white one at that, here goes…

Dear White Women,

If the picture I have painted here does not resemble you beyond melanin levels or the occasional mimosa, please feel free to go about your day, maybe do something nice for someone for no reason. Just keep being awesome, read more books, you know…empowered women things.

If the picture I have painted here does resemble you it is because I know you. I have dared to be different, to speak up and out and you have been the worst of my tormentors. I am more scared of you than I am of strange men and that is saying something. You are bullshit bullies and if there is to be a fight against you and your kind, I know what side I am going to be on.

Time to eat some humble pie and I hope to god it’s as full of shit as y’all are.

Step out of your comfort zone or be forced out.

Wake up, be better, or die off.

Things are changing and your ignorance isn’t welcome here anymore.

Tomorrow I will go back to talking about love and horoscopes, but today, I am angry.

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  • Robert Wertzler December 17, 2017 at 9:06 am

    You get no argument here, only applause, and a reblog.

    • sexloveandgrace December 17, 2017 at 9:08 am

      much appreciated

  • Mel December 17, 2017 at 9:40 am

    As always, well written. THIS is what needs to be said.

    • sexloveandgrace December 17, 2017 at 9:45 am

      thank you. it is just what i needed to say, although i am pleased with how it is being received.

  • Anonymous December 17, 2017 at 10:38 am

    As an Indian woman, I have to say I cannot even imagine being offended by a white woman saying Namaste after yoga. And why would I assume she didn’t know what it meant? Honestly, it’s not that hard to figure out. That idea is petty and ridiculous.

    • sexloveandgrace December 17, 2017 at 10:45 am

      its the entitlement and the false sense of enlightenment i was addressing. there are other examples of cultural appropriation beyond that one. its the idea that if they think something is ‘cool’ they exploit it to death without considering the source. but if this was your only problem with this post, i did alright.

  • Katinka December 17, 2017 at 11:39 am

    “I am more afraid of you than strange men”. How deeply I feel that. Thank you for writing this, thank you for asking, thank you for repeating at the end that if we are not the victims we don’t get a say if weather or not they can be afraid.

    • sexloveandgrace December 17, 2017 at 11:48 am

      the kicker is, they raise those boys, the ones who rape, the ones who attacks gays and anyone different, and their daughters just raise more men like them. its a vicious cycle.

  • Maully December 17, 2017 at 2:30 pm

    *tears*
    *love*

    I’ve said it many times.
    We, as mothers, could fix everything
    in 1 generation,
    *if* we all raised our sons right.

    • sexloveandgrace December 17, 2017 at 2:49 pm

      and you and i have done that. we change the world in small increments

  • Celina December 17, 2017 at 6:04 pm

    They are called Sheeple

    • sexloveandgrace December 17, 2017 at 6:57 pm

      yesh, yesh they are

  • Caitlin Grace December 17, 2017 at 11:05 pm

    I have raised three sons and I know I raised them right when they are just as feminist as their mother. If you are a mother of sons you have a God-given duty to raise them to be the kind of man we need more of and if you don’t shame on you!
    Loved this article

    • sexloveandgrace December 18, 2017 at 8:28 am

      i only have the one son, but he protects everyone he meets. i did good and i know it. thank you for raising yours right too!

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